Bertie Plays Santa

Now here’s a little secret
I’ve never told before
Deep inside Bertie’s burrow
There is a hidden door
Inside is Bertie’s workshop
Away from prying eyes
Where Bertie has spent hours
Making the bunnies a surprise
He started it at Easter
And not a day too soon
Because he only finished
When the earth eclipsed the moon
It started as a train set
And then just grew and grew
As he added trees and rivers
And lots of houses too
Bertie made each and every item
Carefully crafted in fine wood
And now on Christmas Eve
It’s looking rather good
So once the night has fallen
And the bunnies are asleep
Bertie dressed as Santa
To his workshop he will creep
And with the help of Bessie
Before a brand new dawn
The gift will be up and ready
In time for Christmas morn

©Marian Barker

Bunnies in Autumn

Bertie & Bessie took the Bunnies for a walk outside of town
An afternoon in the countryside to see the leaves fall down
They wrapped up warm and cosily all in their winter coats
Walking by the river where they saw some swans and boats
Travelling along a winding path and across a crooked stile
They saw a wooden signpost when they’d been gone a while
It pointed towards the forest the locals call “Badgers’ Wood”
Bertie said that they might see some if they were very good
Quickly they crossed a wooden footbridge all in a little row
The bunnies were a little worried to watch the river’s flow
Soon all were safely over and standing on the muddy track
Bessie said they could play ‘pooh sticks’ on their way back
They tiptoed into the forest like a little band of thieves
And soon were having lots of fun kicking up the leaves
Bessie then found a fallen tree and sat down for a while
Watching Bertie and the Bunnies always makes her smile
The triplets collected acorns and chestnuts by the score
The twins performed cartwheels across the forest floor
Bertie smiled at Bessie and Bessie smiled straight back
Then gathered the Bunnies together on the beaten track
The tired little family slowly walked back into town
From an afternoon in the forest seeing the leaves fall down

©Marian Barker

Bertie Bunny's Birthright

Bertie Bunny is very special
In fact he's quite unique
He likes to walk and talk
Instead of hop and squeak

His parents are two bloggers
Who simply met by chance
His Daddy lives in Wales
His Mummy lives in France

Today’s his Daddy’s birthday
So Bertie thought it would be nice
If Mummy wrote a special poem
She didn’t need asking twice

His Daddy is Mainbunny
His Mummy is La_spice
Mainbunny had an idea that
A bunny poem would be nice

So that’s how Bertie started
His life here in Bunnyland
He was a little accident
He wasn’t really planned

Before you start to gossip
No-one has been deceived
Because lovely Bertie Bunny
Was immaculately conceived

©Marian Barker

Bertie Went to Join the Theatre

Bertie had this inkling from a very early age
That when he was older he’d act upon the stage
So as the days got shorter and there wasn’t any sun
He thought he’d join the theatre and have a bit of fun
The village hall was buzzing with bunnies by the score
He nearly went straight home because he wasn’t very sure
But cousin Jasper was behind him and gave a little push
So Bertie found himself right in the middle of the crush
The bunny-in-charge said “Dahlinks, stop shoving at the back
There’s room for everyone so please cut me a bit of slack”
He called everybody “Lovie” and blew kisses in the air
And Bertie thought a silky kaftan was a funny thing to wear
He said his name was “Bunny” which Bertie thought was odd
He looked straight at his cousin and Jasper simply gave a nod
They both tiptoed to the doorway as quietly as could be
And hopped back home to Bertie’s house to have a cup of tea

©Marian Barker

Bertie Goes to the Zoo

Bertie thought it would be different
To take his family to the Zoo
To see the different animals
And be educational too
Bessie got the children ready
For this wonderful surprise
And when they saw the creatures
They couldn’t believe their eyes

They thought they saw a monster
Just as they turned the bend
Big and grey with enormous ears
And a tail at either end
Then they saw a creature
That simply did a wiggle
This one also had two tails
That met right in the middle

They saw the biggest pussy cats
That they had ever seen
The bunnies were relieved
That there was a moat between
Then in another bit of water
And lying just beneath
They saw a great big log
With great big snapping teeth

The bunnies soon got tired
For it had been a busy day
And on their way back home
They hadn’t much to say
Except that they were happy
And so very grateful too
That they lived in a nice burrow
And not in a great big zoo

©Marian Barker

Bertie Goes to London

Bertie went to London
He flew with Ryan Hare
Each took a little rucksack
With a change of clothes to wear
Bessie had made some sandwiches
For their lunch break on the way
And cousin Jasper gave them
The address of where to stay

They landed near the city
And then they took a bus
It all seemed very easy
And went without much fuss
They saw the landmark buildings
From way up in the sky
As they slowly went in a circle
Upon the London Eye

Next they ventured underground
In a great big rabbit warren
That wasn’t like the ones at home
It all felt strange and foreign
The walls were lined with pictures
And the stairs moved up and down
With the noisiest machinery
Beneath old London town

Bertie didn’t like this place
And couldn’t wait to leave
But Ryan Hare said “Come on
I have something up my sleeve”
They exited the underground
As it was getting dark
There they saw a signpost
Saying “This Way to the Park”
And there in front of Bertie
He couldn’t believe his eyes
Were scores and scores of rabbits
All shouting “Surprise, surprise”

Bertie and Ryan had a great time
And partied through the night
Before leaving early morning
To catch their homeward flight

©Marian Barker

Bertie at the Fair

Bertie’s Bunnies were excited
They kept jumping up and down
Because a travelling fairground
Had arrived in Bunnytown
The Bunnies ate their breakfast
And then went to the green
Where they found a Ferris wheel
The first they’d ever seen
They climbed into a carriage
That then went round and round
Taking Bertie and the Bunnies
High up off the ground
They then rode on a carousel
With horses brightly painted
They galloped up and down
And Bessie nearly fainted
Next they found some sideshows
And a funny coconut shy
With lots of lovely prizes
So Bertie had to have a try
He threw three wooden balls
But each one failed to score
The Bunnies laughed out loud
As they landed on the floor
Then they all tried candy floss
The Bunnies weren’t impressed
As the fluffy pink confection
Stuck on each face and chest
They laughed at Bertie’s whiskers
All pink and very funny
Then they yawned in unison
Each one a sleepy bunny
The youngest climbed on Bertie’s back
As off up the road they went
Such a very happy family
Each and everyone content

©Marian Barker

Bertie Joins a Choir

Bertie thought he needed a new hobby to keep him occupied
He wasn’t quite sure what to do - it was so hard to decide
Mr Owl who lived next door said “Why not join our choir?
I sing bass but, at a guess, I would say that you sing higher”

Bertie had a little think and said he’d have a go
He used to sing at school but that was very long ago
So early Friday evening he went along to sing
With Owl’s group of singers beside the fairy ring

The conductor was a hedgehog with a baton in his hand
With a family of field mice making up a lovely band
The choir was an assortment of creatures great and small
Bertie felt extremely welcomed, he wasn’t scared at all

They started singing scales to warm up - that was fun
Then sang a rabbit medley starting “Run Rabbit Run”
“Doe, Ray, Me” and “Bright Eyes” then “The Bunny Hop”
Bertie sang his little heart out, he didn’t want to stop

He skipped home in the moonlight whilst owl flew on ahead
Then tiptoed quietly into his house as the bunnies were in bed
He softly hummed the melodies still playing in his head
Then made himself some supper of lightly toasted bread

He was such a happy bunny and was so glad he’d gone along
Next day he surprised Bessie and serenaded her with a song

©Marian Barker

Bank Holiday Bunnies

Bertie decided to take his family to the Beach
As a lovely seaside town was in easy reach
Each bunny carried a bucket and a little spade
Whilst Bessie took a parasol to give a bit of shade
They set off early morning with a packed up lunch
And trotted down the lanes, they were a happy bunch
At last they reached the seaside and the golden sand
Bessie said “It’s lovely” and Bertie said “Just grand”
The bunnies made a sand castle with turrets and a moat
Whilst Bessie read a story whilst sat on Bertie’s coat
Then shortly after lunch they had a paddle in the sea
Before hopping back to Bunny Town just in time for tea

©Marian Barker

Bertie’s Dancing Lesson

Bertie needed a new hobby so he thought he’d take a chance
And enrolled at a local dance school so he could learn to dance
He was feeling very nervous as he’d two left bunny feet
But the teacher was so very kind, the nicest you could meet
First he tried the Rabbit Trot and then the Bunny Hop
The hour passed so quickly that he didn’t want to stop
The teacher said he was a perfect pupil, Bertie gave a smile
She told him lots of practice would make it all worthwhile
He left the class so happy and hopped along the street
Determined some day soon he’d sweep Bessie off her feet

©Marian Barker

Bertie and the Wedding Invitation

Bertie got an invitation to a wedding in the post
On very special stationery from a very special host
It came in a gold envelope with lots of sealing wax
He thought it was a summons for some unpaid tax
He opened it so carefully with a shaky bunny paw
And read the invite then quickly dropped his jaw
Barely believing what it said so had a second glance
And it was meant for Bertie or a big mistake perchance
But there in big gold letters in copperplate of course
Beneath a family crest with a lion, unicorn and horse
“Mr & Mrs Bunny are invited to attend”~ so far so good
“A very special wedding next week in Bluebell Wood”
Bertie shouted out to Bessie who was in the other room
That his lovely niece Angora had found herself a groom
Bessie read the invitation and frowned a little frown
“The invite says “formal” and I haven’t got a gown”
Bertie told her not to worry and put on his thinking cap
Then he had a bright idea ~ he’s such a clever chap
He said “wear your wedding dress and with a little cash
We’ll buy some pretty ribbon to tie round it as a sash”
Bessie tried her dress on and Bertie smiled with pride
As he clearly remembered the day she was his bride
So off they went to Bluebell Wood smiling all the way
Just as much in love and happy as on their wedding day

©Marian Barker

Bertie the Easter Bunny

Bertie woke up extra early and tiptoed from his house
Creeping very, very slowly and as quiet as a mouse
This wasn’t very easy with his bunny rabbit legs
And carrying a basket of pretty coloured eggs
He went into this garden and gently as you please
Hid the eggs in flowerpots and underneath the trees
He put some in the window box and others on the grass
So that his little bunnies would spot them as they pass
And when his task was finished he hurried back inside
He smiled as he remembered what fun it was to hide

He put five little baskets on the table with a note
Sent by the Easter Bunny and this is what he wrote
“Dear little Bunnies, here’s a basket for each of you
So go out in the garden and see what you can do
Collect all the pretty eggs I’ve left for you to find
Being very, very careful that not one is left behind
When you’re sure you’ve finished, bring them back to here
Whoever has the most is the winner, I hope I’ve made it clear”
He signed it “Easter Bunny” then hopped back to his bed
With so many happy thoughts going round inside his head

Just as he was nodding off he heard that familiar sound
Of all his little children laughing and hopping all around
He went into the kitchen to find such a commotion
The atmosphere was magic and full of such emotion
The bunnies chose their baskets and quickly ran outside
Bertie and Bessie watched them as the door was open wide
They hurried and they scurried, gathering eggs galore
Before coming back exhausted in a heap upon the floor
Bessie helped them count the eggs ~ everyone had twenty
Each one got a prize, Bertie made sure that there was plenty
A chocolate egg for everyone including mum and dad
Everyone agreed it was the best time they’d ever had

©Marian Barker

Bertie in the Garden

Times are hard in Bunnyland so Bertie has a plan
To cultivate his garden and grow carrots if he can
He’s cleared a shady corner of all the tangled weeds
And been off to the market and bought a pack of seeds
He’s going to look on t’internet to see what’s next to do
Meanwhile the lovely Bessie has made him a nice hot brew
Bertie’s found a useful website called “Gardening BBC”
And is reading up on carrots whilst sipping on his tea
It says “carrots are nourishing and keep you fit and strong”
So growing some in your garden a bunny can’t go wrong
“Work the soil thoroughly. Remove all rocks and stones
Sow the seeds very deeply. Ignore your aching bones”
Bertie finishes his second cuppa and he smiles a little smile
He’s off to plant his carrot seeds and may be gone a while

©Marian Barker

Bertie in Space

Bertie climbed into the rocket
Just as it was getting dark
It wasn’t very comfortable
And very cold and stark
He wore brand new space suit
And really looked the part
He settled in the driving seat
With a rapidly beating heart
He waited for the countdown
Five, four, three, two, one
The huge space ship shook
And in a trice he was gone
He sped along the Milky Way
And marvelled at the view
As planets passed the windows
Some familiar and some new
Excitement grew each second
Bertie couldn’t believe his eyes
When suddenly he landed
With a bump, a big surprise
He scrambled to his feet
And quickly scratched his head
The spaceship ride was all a dream
And he’d just fallen out of bed

©Marian Barker

Bertie Joins a Band

Bertie wanted a new hobby
And thought it would be grand
If he could learn to play the drums
And join the local band
He bought a set on eBay
They arrived the other day
Along with some tuition books
And Bertie began to play
Bessie went into the kitchen
And shut herself within
She baked a batch of cookies
Whilst Bertie made a din
She heard the crashing cymbals
The tom-toms and the snare
The base drum and triangle
It didn’t stop just there
The kit came with a cowbell
A tambourine and chimes
And Bessie got a headache
The worse one of all times
So Bessie put her foot down
Like she’d never done before
And told Bertie that in future
He must close the study door
Bertie practiced every morning
Improving every passing day
Very soon he had a repertoire
Of things that he could play
He went along to band practice
Just to check some details out
“Welcome Bertie Bunny”
He heard everybody shout
“We hear that you’re a drummer
Please tell us that it’s right
Because we haven’t got one
So can you start tonight?”
Bertie clapped his hands together
And then he quickly smiled
Before he could answer “Yes”
The whole band went quite wild

©Marian Barker

Bertie’s Dream

It was a windy rainy Sunday
So the Bunnys stayed inside
Bessie did some baking
The little ones went to hide
Bertie settled in his armchair
With cushions soft and deep
And once he put his feet up
He went quickly off to sleep
He dreamt he was in paradise
Upon a beautiful white beach
With Bessie and the bunnies
All safe within easy reach
The sea was lovely turquoise
With the softest waves of white
Palm trees dipped their branches
It was such an awesome sight
Then Bertie heard some shouting
And was startled by the fuss
Of someone calling in the distance
“Daddy come and look for us”
His sleep was rudely interrupted
When he heard the voices shriek
So Bertie joined the kiddies
In their game of hide and seek

©Marian Barker

Bertie Goes to the City

Bertie went up to the city
To see what was the fuss
He left early in the morning
On the inter-city bus
He took a little rucksack
To carry on his back
With a lettuce for his lunch
And some carrots for a snack
He sat beside the driver
So he could look around
And watch the changing landscape
As they sped along the ground
They drove away from Bunnytown
And long the country lane
They passed the railway station
And Bertie saw a little train
As the bus went up a big hill
And down the other side
Bertie was so very happy
As he did enjoy the ride
The scenery began to change
And the trees got less and less
The fields turned into concrete
Bertie thought it looked a mess
The houses were packed together
The buildings were so tall
Bertie couldn’t see the sunshine
And he didn’t like that at all
They reached the city centre
And Bertie stepped into the street
It was dirty and so noisy
Everybody rushing off their feet
Bertie didn’t like it in the city
So he went to catch the train
To take him back to Bunnytown
And safely home again

©Marian Barker

Bertie the Hero

Bertie was in his garden
With his rolled up sleeves
Tidying the borders
And raking up the leaves
All the little bunnies
Were busy playing out
Somewhere in the distance
Bertie heard a little shout
Then someone came running
To where Bertie was stood
Saying somebody had fallen
Down a pothole in the wood
Bertie quickly gathered up
Some things he thought he’d need
And hurried into the forest
At his very fastest speed
A little crowd had collected
So he pushed them all aside
Then he took his flash lamp
And shone a light inside
At the bottom of the chasm
He spied a tiny form
So he threw a blanket down
To keep the casualty warm
And then he tied a rope
Quite securely to a tree
Before lowering himself down
As carefully as could be
He reached a little rabbit
Frightened but unharmed
Then brought her to the surface
Once he knew that she had calmed
Her parents declared Bertie a hero
And gave their little one a hug
Bertie blushed and then said quietly
“It was nothing” with a shrug
Bertie hopped back to his garden
And finished clearing off the path
Then took off his muddy boots
And went inside to have a bath

©Marian Barker

Bertie’s Hideaway

Some of you will remember
For I’ve mentioned it before
That Bertie has a hideaway
Behind a secret door
His dear wife, lovely Bessie
Has been there once or twice
She says “It’s warm and cosy
And very, very nice”
But it is Bertie’s haven
Much like a garden shed
Where Bertie can relax
And simply rest his head
A place for doing woodwork
A place where he can think
A place for peace and quiet
And sometimes a little drink
Bessie likes it when he goes there
And they have some time apart
For Bertie’s little absences
Makes fonder Bertie’s heart
She’s sure that it’s the secret
For keeping their love alive
In their cosy little burrow
With their little bunnies five

©Marian Barker

Bertie Takes the Twins to School

They set off at eight-thirty
They didn’t want to be late
Bertie and Bessie nervously
Left their bunnies at the gate

The bunnies were excited
They each made a new friend
And didn’t want to leave them
Once the day came to an end

They listened to some stories
They played a game or two
They’re going back tomorrow
To see what they can do

They’re tired little bunnies
Each one’s a sleepy head
So now it’s time for supper
And then it’s time for bed

©Marian Barker

Bertie Plays Santa

Now here’s a little secret
I’ve never told before
Deep inside Bertie’s burrow
There is a hidden door
Inside is Bertie’s workshop
Away from prying eyes
Where Bertie has spent hours
Making the bunnies a surprise
He started it at Easter
And not a day too soon
Because he only finished
When the earth eclipsed the moon
It started as a train set
And then just grew and grew
As he added trees and rivers
And lots of houses too
Bertie made each and every item
Carefully crafted in fine wood
And now on Christmas Eve
It’s looking rather good
So once the night has fallen
And the bunnies are asleep
Bertie dressed as Santa
To his workshop he will creep
And with the help of Bessie
Before a brand new dawn
The gift will be up and ready
In time for Christmas morn

©Marian Barker

Bertie Meets an Angel

Bertie went out walking
In the forest, in the snow
A walk he’d taken many times
He knew which way to go

He first traversed the meadow
That once was lush and green
But now it was all sparkling
The prettiest he had ever seen

He hopped across the tiny stream
All covered over with ice
And smiled softly to himself
And thought “now this is nice”

He wandered into the forest
His favourite place to be
He was in seventh heaven
As he hopped from tree to tree

Snowflakes softly floated
Through the air without a sound
And tickled Bertie’s nose
Before falling to the ground

Bertie giggled rather loudly
And then turned around to go
But couldn’t see his tracks
All buried in the snow

His joy was turned to sadness
And his tears began to fall
“Don’t be afraid dear rabbit”
A gentle voice did call

And from a branch above him
A pure white feather fell
And the voice said “dearest Bertie
Trust me and you’ll be well”

A snowy owl flew down beside him
Then gave him a warming smile
And told him she’d fly above him
For each and every mile

Then when they got to Bunnytown
The owl flew quietly away
And Bertie rushed inside his home
For he’d such a lot to say

He warned his children of the dangers
Of wandering in the snow
And told them of his rescue
They wanted so to know

Bertie gently told his story
As they sat beside his knee
“Today I met an angel
In the forest by a tree”

©Marian Barker

Winter in Bunnytown

Bertie woke up Sunday morning
And hopped out of his bed
He found his bedroom freezing
So he hopped back in instead
He snuggled under the duvet
And gave Bessie a big hug
Then hopped off to the kitchen
To fetch coffee in a mug
He hopped back to the bedroom
And to his great surprise
He saw lots of bunny heads
And lots of bunny eyes
The children laughed and giggled
When they saw their daddy’s face
And they said “Come on daddy
For we have saved your place”
Bertie told them all a story
As they lay there warm and snug
And Bessie smiled contented
Sipping coffee from her mug

©Marian Barker

Bertie has a Party

Bertie was so happy
Bertie was so glad
He had found his brother
The only one he ever had

His brother had been missing
About two years or three
When he left the family burrow
And ran away to sea

But brother Buck was surfing
One day on the internet
And found Bertie on Facebook
And thought it time they met

So Bertie organised a party
At his home in Bunny Town
And invited his relations
To quickly come on down

Bessie made a tasty buffet
And baked a carrot cake
And Bertie hung up a banner
He had to quickly make

So Buck arrived by taxi
And everybody cheered
He looked so much like Bertie
They found it rather weird

The evening was a big success
No one wanted it to end
Buck had found his brother
And Bertie a new friend

©Marian Barker

Bertie Bunny Goes on Facebook

Bertie had a long lost brother
So he thought he’d take a look
At some social network sites
So he signed up to Facebook

He wrote himself a profile
And hoped he’d be in luck
That soon he’d be discovered
By his missing brother Buck

He only joined on Monday
With the help of his son Hutch
And early Wednesday morning
Bertie’s brother got in touch

He quickly explained to Bertie
How he’d run away to sea
And that he was unhappy
And he missed his family

Bertie told him not to worry
That he’d like to put things right
So they’re having a big re-union
At Bertie’s home on Sunday night

©Marian Barker

Bertie Bunny Goes Fishing

Bertie’s country cousin Jasper invited him to stay
For the weekend in the country, and a little getaway
He said he’d take him fishing at a nearby lake
Setting off quite early as soon as they’re awake

Bertie was excited and didn’t need asking twice
And told his country cousin “That would be very nice”
He packed an overnight bag and kissed Bessie goodbye
Bessie said “be careful” and tried hard not to cry

Bertie set off after dinner and arrived in time for supper
And Jasper’s wife Jessica gave him a carrot and a cuppa
Early the next morning the ‘lads’ wandered through the gate
With a picnic in one hand and in the other hand some bait

They soon arrived beside the lake and each one sat apart
And as the hours slipped slowly by, Bertie started losing heart
The only thing he’d managed to catch was a rusty mangled wheel
Whilst Jasper had a lot of fish inside his wicker creel

Bertie started asking questions of how he’d got it wrong
And why he hadn’t got a bite – it didn’t take him long
He discovered his mistake – thanks to his fishing mate
He’d eaten the fish’s bread and used carrots for his bait

©Marian Barker

Bertie Bunny Goes Flying

Bertie Bunny was so nervous
And his mouth was very dry
He’d booked himself some lessons
So that he could learn to fly

He turned up at the hare field
As the lessons were held there
And was met by his instructor
The fearless Ryan Hare

He put on a khaki flying suit
And a funny leather hat
When he looked into the mirror
He thought “I like the look of that”

He climbed into the cockpit
And looked at all the dials
He frowned for just a second
Then his face was full of smiles

Ryan jumped in right beside him
And showed Bertie what to do
It wasn’t long before he said
“Now Bertie it’s up to you”

Bertie did what he’d been instructed
And they soon were off the ground
Looping the loop and laughing
As the pair flew round and round

Ryan looked quite pleased with Bertie
When they stopped a little later
And said he was quite a natural
When using the in-flight simulator

Bertie thanked Ryan Hare very much
And he paid him twenty pound
But he said he wouldn’t go back again
As he preferred four feet on the ground

©Marian Barker

Bertie and Bessie’s Boudoir

Inside the Bunny’s boudoir
The walls are gold and red
And right there in middle
Is a great big feather bed

There are oh so many pillows
And a lovely faux-fur throw
And loads of scented candles
Which make the whole room glow

Curtains drape around the window
And they gently touch the floor
There are bunches of dried lavender
Bessie gathered on the moor

A proper little palace
All cosy and serene
Where Bertie is the King
And Bessie is his Queen

©Marian Barker

Bertie Goes to the Countryside

Bertie’s country cousin Jasper
Who lives outside of town
Sent Bertie an invitation
Simply saying “come on down”

Now Jasper & Jessica Rabbit
Live on a country estate
With acres of room to entertain
Behind a five barred gate

So Bertie, Bessie and the brood
Set off there Friday morn
They'd got up extra early
Five minutes after dawn

They all hopped out together
Along the country lanes
Through the Greenwood Forest
And across the golden planes

They got there at mid morning
Well before the midday sun
They had a big reunion
And lots of rabbit fun

The little ones played ‘hide and seek’
And ‘catch me if you can’
Whilst the grown ups sat and chatted
About the state of man

The hours passed so quickly
The day seemed far too short
And soon it was the time to go
Bertie & Bessie said they ought

And so our bunny family
Hopped back across the plain
Through the Greenwood Forest
And safely home again.

©Marian Barker

Bertie Goes to the Gym

Bertie woke up Monday morning
And he rolled out of his bed
There was a time not long ago
He’d have quickly hopped instead
He sauntered to the kitchen
Then wandered too and fro
Before strolling off to work
He really didn’t want to go

All day he surveyed burrows
And very soon had to admit
That burrows were getting smaller
Because Bertie hadly fit
And when he’d finished working
That day at half past four
He found he had a struggle
Getting through his own front door

He stopped a while and wondered
And then his face went red
Because he suddenly realised
His bunny waist had spread
He went inside to Bessie
And gave his wife a kiss
And then said “dearest darling
Does my tum look big in this?”

Bessie said she liked cuddly bunnies
Cuddly bunnies just like him
But if it bothered Bertie
Perhaps he’d better find a gym?
Bertie donned his jogging bottoms
And his t-shirt and a sweat
Found his trainers in the closet
And on his marks got set

He found a smart gymnasium
The other side of Bunny Town
And jogged up there each evening
And then jogged right back down
He smiled as he got thinner
And it didn’t cost him money
You can hear his neighbours saying
“There goes a healthy, happy bunny”

©Marian Barker

Bertie and his Brood

Bertie loves his children
Each and every one
He spends a lot of time with them
And shows them right from wrong

He tells them lots of stories
About bunny days gone by
And always has an answer
For every “what?” and “why?”

Bertie, Bessie and the bunnies
Go each day for a walk
And almost every evening
They sit around and talk

They eat their meals together
Around the kitchen table
They have their pals around
As often as they’re able

And when the children go to bed
Bertie and Bessie say out loud
“We love you little bunnies
You make us feel so proud”

The children laugh and giggle
Like happy bunnies do
And then they say in unison
“Mum and Dad we love you too”

©Marian Barker

Bertie Goes to the Optician

Bertie reads a bedtime story
To his little ones each night
But once or twice he noticed
He had trouble with his sight

First he changed the light bulb
In the bunny nursery
But it made no scrap of difference
He said “it must be me”

Bessie said that she had noticed
That he squinted when he read
“The Daily Burrow” paper
Each evening in their bed

They thought it must age related
But they’d better be quite sure
So Bertie went to the optician
Mr Owl who lived next door

Mr Owl asked him to read a chart
That was hanging on the door
And then he asked some questions
Bertie didn’t know what for

He asked Bertie about his diet
He knew things weren’t quite right
Bertie wasn’t eating enough carrots
To help him see at night

Bertie doesn’t need any glasses
And he didn’t have to pay
Mr Owl told him to remember
To eat carrots five times every day

©Marian Barker

Bertie’s in the Dog House

Bertie’s in real trouble
And poor Bessie is irate
He’s started going out at night
And getting home real late

She didn’t mind him going
With his mates down to the pub
But she really was unhappy
When he went to the Bunny Club

All those doe-eyed bunnies
With fluffy tails and teeth
With skimpy little outfits
And little underneath

So Bertie has been grounded
And Bessie’s trying to do her best
To entertain him every night
In her fluffy bunny vest

Now Bertie’s very happy
Though he didn’t like to say
That he didn’t like the Bunny Club
In any single way

He only went to show the lads
That he really wasn’t a prude
But now he can’t tell Bessie
For that would be quite rude

So he’s staying in the dog house
For the dog house suits him fine
Bessie hops in right beside him
Each evening just after nine

As they cuddle up together
It’s a joy to hear their laughter
And so Bertie and his Bessie
Will live happily ever after

©Marian Barker

Bertie’s Baby Boom

Bertie and Bessie were so happy
In their home beside a tree
Warren and Doug were little darlings
And the Bunny’s did agree
They’d have a bigger family
And this time they had three

Once again poor Bertie Bunny
Had sickness every morn
And his ankles were quite puffy
Until their triplets were born

Bessie coped with everything
Just like she’d done before
The morning they arrived
She’d been vacuuming the floor

Bertie took himself out walking
He couldn’t take the strain
When Bessie went into labour
And gave birth once again

First to come along was Lettice
Such a dainty little doe
And then came Stew and Hutch
Two strapping bucks you know

Bertie Bunny was delighted
And really proud as punch
As he hopped into the kitchen
To make himself some lunch

©Marian Barker

Bertie Learns to Bake

Bertie has a brand new pastime
He’s learning how to bake
He bought himself a recipe book
To see what he could make

He had lots and lots of carrots
That he had grown from seeds
And only a few more ingredients
Was what the recipe needs

He peeled and then he grated
All day it seemed to take
But it was worth it in the end
You should see his carrot cake

He still had 24 carrots left
To feed the Bunny troop
So he put them in the blender
And made some golden soup

©Marian Barker

Bertie’s Burrow and Beyond

Bertie has a bijou residence
In leafy Bunny Town
It’s homely and it’s comfy
And it’s painted green and brown

It was a batchelor bunny pad
Until Bertie and Bessie wed
And now it’s been transformed
Into a family home instead

They’ve done some alterations
To make more room inside
For they’ve had a few additions
Since Bessie became his bride

There are curtains at the window
Bessie stitched them with such care
There’s a lovely mat outside
To say you’re always welcome there

They’ve got a little garden
With flowers and some veg
Bessie’s even planted geraniums
Along the window ledge

The Bunny’s are so happy
There’s so much love to share
In this corner of the world
Where laughter fills the air

©Marian Barker

Bertie in Bunnyland

Bertie joined the local drama group
Because acting was in his blood
They asked him to audition
They said that he was good

They offered him a leading roll
In their latest presentation
He agreed to play White Rabbit
Without further hesitation

He was so thrilled and happy
And he didn’t bear any malice
When Bessie said that she’d been picked
To play the part of Alice

And so they both took to the stage
And rehearsals were in full swing
For Alice’s Adventures in Bunnyland
To be performed some time in Spring

Bertie learned his lines quite quickly
As he sat on the garden gate
You’d often hear him saying
“I’m late, I’m late, I’m late”

Bessie looked delightful
In her dress of blue and white
And couldn’t wait to wear it
On the stage on opening night

So if you want to see them
Please let Bertie know
So he can get you tickets
To come and see the show

©Marian Barker

Bertie Bunny MBE

Bertie got a formal letter
In the post with all the rest
Along with bills and circulars
This one was far the best

It came from the “Buck Palace”
Addressed to Bertie Bunny Esquire
To say that he’d been nominated
“Member of the Bunny Empire”

He and his wife were summoned
To attend a right big do
Where he’d receive his medal
And meet some bunny royalty too

They travelled to the palace
All in their Sunday best
Bessie wore a hat to match
Bertie’s brand new vest

He looked a bobby dazzler
And Bessie was so proud
When Bertie’s name was called
And he stepped out of the crowd

He hopped on the red carpet
As proud as punch was he
The very day that he became
Bertie Bunny MBE

©Marian Barker

Bertie Becomes a Dad

The Bunnys had been married
About a week or two
And thought they’d start a family
As bunnies often do

Poor Bertie was quite poorly
And ill each day ‘til noon
Whilst Bessie just got on with it
Her time came round quite soon

Bertie boiled a pot of water
It was just gone half past three
And when Bessie didn’t want it
He made himself a cup of tea

He went into the garden
And paced as fathers do
Then Bessie called “I’ve had it”
“Hang on I think there’s two”

And so the Bunny twins arrived
Bertie gave them both a hug
The first one they called Warren
And the second they named Doug

Poor Bertie was so exhausted
And he took himself to bed
“I’m glad that it’s all over”
Were the last words Bertie said

©Marian Barker

Bertie Bunny Gets Married

Bertie wasted no time
Getting Bessie up the aisle
It was a grand occasion
They did it in good style

He was a burrow surveyor
So he had a bob or two
Bertie hired a wedding planner
Just like wealthy people do

They jetted off and married
Upon a snow white beach
And Bertie kissed his bride
And made his wedding speech

He said that he was happy
And he couldn’t want for more
Then he held his darling Betsy
As they danced across the floor

They made the perfect couple
On that lovely day in June
And off they went together
To spend their Bunnymoon

©Marian Barker

Bertie Bunny's First Date

Bertie was so very happy
And he could hardly wait
To meet his only girlfriend
Beside the garden gate

They dined together in the garden
There were lettuces galore
And then hopped off together
When they could eat no more

He gently held her by the paw
As along the lane they strolled
And Bertie knew without a doubt
That together they’d grow old

He’d fallen for young Bessie
His heart was filled with pride
As he got down on one paw
And asked her to be his bride

She said she’d be delighted
It made him want to sing
As he pulled out of his pocket
A twenty four carrot ring

They sat so close together
Then watched the sun go down
The happiest pair of bunnies
In all of Bunny Rabbit Town

©Marian Barker

Bertie Bunny Goes Dancing

Bertie Bunny got an invite
To a disco party in the wood
And decided to be brave
He thought it would be good

The dress code was informal
So he wore his blue suede shoes
And matching shirt and denims
He always felt so good in blues

He didn’t need to use a mirror
As he’d left those days behind
And he looked a bobby dazzler
The bunny years had been so kind

Bertie enjoyed the disco party
He danced until he dropped
He did the jive and jitterbug
And even bunny hopped

He saw a lovely lady bunny
From the corner of his eye
And he asked her out to dinner
And “yes” was her reply

Now Bertie is a happy bunny
And his life has just begun
So stick around and read about
Bertie Bunny having fun

©Marian Barker

Bertie the Bunny

Bertie bunny was unhappy
Bertie bunny was so sad
He lived inside his burrow
Without friends ~ he always had

He didn’t go to parties
Held in the forest late at night
‘cos when he looked in the mirror
He thought he looked a sight

He didn’t like his teeth you see
He thought they were too big
And “what big ears I have” said he
“- though I shouldn’t give a fig”

“My legs are far too bandy
And a wonky tail have I
If I look into this mirror
I know that I will cry”

One day he hopped out of his bed
And something hurt his paw
The mirror had fallen in the night
And lay broken on the floor

He couldn’t see his reflection
In fact he didn’t care
Because inside his head
Was a lovely bunny there

And once he’d stopped consulting
The mirror on the wall
He became a happy bunny
And not alone at all

The moral of this poem
Is very clear to me
Stop looking in that mirror
And a happy bunny be

©Marian Barker